I put "crazy person" in quotes because everyone has a different definition of what makes someone "crazy".
That's a good question: What is crazy? Well, let's take a look at the different definitions of "crazy", shall we?
CRAZY:
1. mentally deranged; demented; insane.
2. senseless; impractical; totally unsound: a crazy scheme.
3. Informal. intensely enthusiastic; passionately excited: crazy about baseball.
4. Informal. very enamored or infatuated (usually followed by about): He was crazy about her.
5. Informal. intensely anxious or eager; impatient: I'm crazy to try those new skis.
6. Informal. unusual; bizarre; singular: She always wears a crazy hat.
7. Slang. wonderful; excellent; perfect: That's crazy, man, crazy.
8. likely to break or fall to pieces.
9. weak, infirm, or sickly.
10. having an unusual, unexpected, or random quality, behavior, result, pattern, etc.: a crazy reel that spins in either direction.
Noun, plural crazies
11. Slang. an unpredictable, nonconforming person; oddball:a house full of crazies who wear weird clothes and come in at all hours.
11. Slang. an unpredictable, nonconforming person; oddball:a house full of crazies who wear weird clothes and come in at all hours.
12. The crazies, Slang. a sense of extreme unease, nervousness, or panic; extreme jitters:
The crew was starting to get the crazies from being cooped up belowdecks for so long.
13. like crazy,
-
Slang. with great enthusiasm or energy; to an extreme: We shopped like crazy and bought all our Christmas gifts in one afternoon.
- with great speed or recklessness: He drives like crazy once he's out on the highway.
Yep, that about sums it up in definitive terms.
But what about the non-definitive terms? What I mean to say is, what makes a person "crazy"?
Everyone on the planet has a different definition as to who/what a crazy person is. I consider myself a "crazy" simply because I have a very uncontrolled case of bipolar disorder emphasis on depression, along with PTSD, disruptive sleep disorder, severe generalized anxiety, postpartum depression, borderline personality disorder and self awareness issues.
I'm a wallop of a mix, aren't I? LOL
Keeping myself sane, patient, calm, collected, resourceful and rational are difficult tasks for me every day. I wake up every morning and I have to test the waters a little bit for about an hour or so to see if, after I take my morning meds, I'm going to be so irritable that I would rather rip someone's face off than look at them.
I can't help it. I never know what kind of mood I'm going to be in when I first wake up. I wonder what that's like? To just wake up and have a refreshed feeling about yourself....I bet it's nice. I bet it's nice to know that you aren't going to turn into an irritated monster bitch because of one thing that happened to you early in the day or even yesterday.
Things need to change, though. Lately, I've had more irritated moments than my regular mood swings and it's affecting my relationship with my husband. I need to fix this....I need to fix me...
If I don't, I fear I may lose my dear sweet husband forever. I love my husband, so very much. And imagining a life without him, without my best friend.....well, that's a life I don't want to live.
So I struggle, endlessly, to keep a level of calm that I think is "normal" when all I want to do is rage out and throw things to get my point across but my rational brain kicks in then and I maintain my calm and continue on with my day.
If my rational brain does not kick in, however, then things go south, very, very south, very, very quickly .
I guess what I'm trying to get across is that I have to TRY to stay sane, every day. How many other people can say that?
I guess what I'm trying to get across is that I have to TRY to stay sane, every day. How many other people can say that?
I mean, I'm not naive. I know there are other people out there who suffer from these mental disorders/diseases daily just like I do but at the same time no two people are exactly alike. Therefore, no two mental illnesses/disorders/diseases are exactly alike.
I have a perfect example: My husband, Adam, is ADHD, bipolar emphasis on manic and has generalized anxiety, as well.
He does not require daily medication to stay sane. To stay....normal.
He controls his ADHD and bipolar with many coping outlets he has learned over the years that work well for him.
I have looked to my husband for so much advice and comfort in my battle to remember who I was before my bipolar and anxiety took over.
I have begun seeing a psychologist who has taken the time to check and see which diagnoses actually apply to me so I can get the right support and medication and coping mechanisms for what I actually suffer from.
There's a thought, why do you get told that you "suffer" from these syndromes, diseases, disorders and conditions?
Is my very existence considered "suffering"?
I have so many mental health disorders that no one ever really gets into the physical ones that do not in any way shape or form help with my mental health disorders.
For instance, I have IBSD, that's irritable bowel syndrome with diarrhea. Yea, I take about thirty 2mg loperamide (otherwise known as Imodium) per day just to control my IBSD symptoms.
The extensive research I've done on the topic shows that only and I mean, only, loperamide, Imodium does any good to make these symptoms bearable in daily life.
Without those "magickal" little green pills I am left with this awful need to run to the bathroom every time my guts start to ache because I know sooner or later, if I don't make it to the bathroom, I will crap my pants.
As a 33 year old adult do you know how embarrassing that is? I'm sure you don't. If you do, then believe me when I say, I believe and understand you and I hate it as much as you do.
I have to take extra special care of what I eat and when and how much because if I'm not careful I may end up having to stop on the way to my next destination to crap my brains out. Not only is it foul smelling because my body hasn't had appropriate time to digest everything but it is is annoyingly time consuming. I mean, come on, thirty minutes in the bathroom at least three times a day is an hour and a half of waiting for my body to decide what it wants to do with the food I put in it.
Then there's the anxiety, which doesn't help any of my issues, at all. Anxiety instigates my GI tract to be even more irritable than it already is. It makes my muscles tense, my bones begin to ache, my nerves in my lumbar spine that are already irritated begin to burn and throb, my entire body is thrown out of whack when my nerves are off.
Add in serious chronic pain issues not even related to the constant state of panic my body is in and it gets mind boggling tasking just to exist.
My sleep is disrupted by pain, anxiety, nightmares from PTSD...everyone tells me I need to relax, get rid of stress in my life and focus on myself more often.
How do you get rid of stress that is present, literally, because you are alive?
My anxiety is as much a part of me as my right arm is. It's just there, I can't hide it for very long, I have to learn to properly cope with it.
You learn how to exist in this space with that never ending sense of panic.
I don't like how those who are diagnosed with mental diseases or disorders are suddenly under this stigma in our society that they're mentally unstable and their brain function is never considered quite "average".
What is with labeling everyone and what the hell is "average" anymore?
You would think with today's ability to receive knowledge at the tips of your fingers we wouldn't need to label people, at all.
No, we feel the need to label and peg hole people, tell them that this is what's "wrong" with them and shove pharmaceuticals down their throats in hopes to make them feel like....well, like everyone else, like people "should".
I think we need to take a step back and really check into the big picture of what we're doing to the people in our societies with labels and cultural standards and rethink how we categorize the human beings around us.
So here I am Society, one of your crazies, out of the closet and into the light for all to see.
Watch out, I'm crazy....and crazy is, as crazy does.
Hah!
He controls his ADHD and bipolar with many coping outlets he has learned over the years that work well for him.
I have looked to my husband for so much advice and comfort in my battle to remember who I was before my bipolar and anxiety took over.
I have begun seeing a psychologist who has taken the time to check and see which diagnoses actually apply to me so I can get the right support and medication and coping mechanisms for what I actually suffer from.
There's a thought, why do you get told that you "suffer" from these syndromes, diseases, disorders and conditions?
Is my very existence considered "suffering"?
I have so many mental health disorders that no one ever really gets into the physical ones that do not in any way shape or form help with my mental health disorders.
For instance, I have IBSD, that's irritable bowel syndrome with diarrhea. Yea, I take about thirty 2mg loperamide (otherwise known as Imodium) per day just to control my IBSD symptoms.
The extensive research I've done on the topic shows that only and I mean, only, loperamide, Imodium does any good to make these symptoms bearable in daily life.
Without those "magickal" little green pills I am left with this awful need to run to the bathroom every time my guts start to ache because I know sooner or later, if I don't make it to the bathroom, I will crap my pants.
As a 33 year old adult do you know how embarrassing that is? I'm sure you don't. If you do, then believe me when I say, I believe and understand you and I hate it as much as you do.
I have to take extra special care of what I eat and when and how much because if I'm not careful I may end up having to stop on the way to my next destination to crap my brains out. Not only is it foul smelling because my body hasn't had appropriate time to digest everything but it is is annoyingly time consuming. I mean, come on, thirty minutes in the bathroom at least three times a day is an hour and a half of waiting for my body to decide what it wants to do with the food I put in it.
Then there's the anxiety, which doesn't help any of my issues, at all. Anxiety instigates my GI tract to be even more irritable than it already is. It makes my muscles tense, my bones begin to ache, my nerves in my lumbar spine that are already irritated begin to burn and throb, my entire body is thrown out of whack when my nerves are off.
Add in serious chronic pain issues not even related to the constant state of panic my body is in and it gets mind boggling tasking just to exist.
My sleep is disrupted by pain, anxiety, nightmares from PTSD...everyone tells me I need to relax, get rid of stress in my life and focus on myself more often.
How do you get rid of stress that is present, literally, because you are alive?
My anxiety is as much a part of me as my right arm is. It's just there, I can't hide it for very long, I have to learn to properly cope with it.
You learn how to exist in this space with that never ending sense of panic.
I don't like how those who are diagnosed with mental diseases or disorders are suddenly under this stigma in our society that they're mentally unstable and their brain function is never considered quite "average".
What is with labeling everyone and what the hell is "average" anymore?
You would think with today's ability to receive knowledge at the tips of your fingers we wouldn't need to label people, at all.
No, we feel the need to label and peg hole people, tell them that this is what's "wrong" with them and shove pharmaceuticals down their throats in hopes to make them feel like....well, like everyone else, like people "should".
I think we need to take a step back and really check into the big picture of what we're doing to the people in our societies with labels and cultural standards and rethink how we categorize the human beings around us.
So here I am Society, one of your crazies, out of the closet and into the light for all to see.
Watch out, I'm crazy....and crazy is, as crazy does.
Hah!
